Tuesday, February 28, 2017

The Thought For Today

“He was a bold man that first ate an oyster.” ― Jonathan Swift

Rec: Easy Oyster Microwave Casserole

1 quart oysters
1/2 teaspoon salt
black pepper to taste
chili powder to taste (optional)
1 cup finely crushed crackers
4 tablespoons butter
1 cup milk, cream or half and half

Drain liquor from oysters and save. Place half of
oysters in casserole dish. Mix seasonings and
sprinkle half over oysters. Cover with half of the
crumbs and dot with 2 tablespoons of the butter.
Add remaining oysters and repeat with seasonings,
crumbs and butter. In a small bowl, mix oyster
liquor and milk. Microwave on HIGH 2 minutes.
Pour over casserole mixture. Cover and microwave
on HIGH for 8 minutes. Let stand covered for 5
minutes then serve.

Serves 6
Refrigerate remainder
Can be reheated next day in microwave

Rec: Oyster Stew

1/2 cup butter
1 cup minced celery
3 tablespoons minced shallots
1 quart half-and-half cream
2 (12 oz) containers fresh shucked oysters, undrained
salt and ground black pepper to taste
1 pinch cayenne pepper, or to taste

Melt the butter in a large skillet over MEDIUM heat, and
cook the celery and shallots until shallots are tender.
Pour half-and-half into a large pot over MEDIUM HIGH
heat. Mix in the butter, celery, and shallot mixture. Stir
continuously. When the mixture is almost boiling, pour the
oysters and their liquid into the pot. Season with salt,
pepper, and cayenne pepper. Stir continuously until the
oysters curl at the ends. When the oysters curl the stew
is finished cooking; turn off the heat and serve.

Serves 4
Refrigerate remainder
Can be reheated in microwave

Rec: Crockpot Clam Chowder

4 (6 1/2 oz.) cans clams with juice or 3 lbs. fresh/frozen
1/2 lb. salt pork or bacon, diced
1 large onion, chopped
6 to 8 large potatoes, peeled and cubed
3 cups water
3 1/2 teaspoons salt
1/4 teaspoon pepper
4 cups half and half cream
3 to 4 tablespoons cornstarch

If the clams are frozen, thaw and cut into bite sized
pieces. In skillet, saute salt pork or bacon and onion
until golden brown and drain. Put into crockpot with
clams. Add all remaining ingredients, except milk.
Cover and cook on HIGH 3 to 4 hours or until potatoes
are tender. During the last hour of cooking, combine
1 or 2 cups of milk with the cornstarch. Add to the
crockpot with rest of milk and stir well. Serve in large
bowls with crusty French bread or some microwave

Serves 4 to 6
Refrigerate remainder
Can be reheated in microwave

Rec: Wasabi Oyster Po’Boy Sandwiches

Wasabi Tartar Sauce:

1 cup wasabi mayonnaise
1/4 cup sweet pickle relish
2 tablespoons minced shallot or onion
2 tablespoons Dijon mustard
2 tablespoons minced fresh parsley leaves
1 teaspoons fresh lemon juice
1/4 teaspoon Louisiana-style hot sauce

Sandwich Filling:

vegetable oil
2 loaves French bread
butter or margarine
cornmeal, seasoned with black pepper and cayenne
24 shucked oysters, drained
sliced tomatoes
shredded lettuce

Heat oil to 375 degrees F. (190 degrees C.) in a deep fryer
or heavy skillet. Meanwhile, prepare the wasabi tartar
sauce by stirring l the ingredients together in a small
bowl and set aside. Slice the loaves of bread into half
horizontally or vertically. Spread inside surfaces of
bread with butter. Place the bread on a baking sheet,
cut sides up. Heat the bread under broiler for 2 or 3
minutes, or until lightly browned; set aside. Place
cornmeal mixture in a plastic bag. Drop in six oysters
at a time and shake until well coated with cornmeal,
knocking off excess. Fry the oysters in batches of six
or less, turning occasionally, until they’re just cooked
through and are golden brown, about 1½ minutes.
Drain on paper towels. Spread each piece of bread with
2 tablespoons of wasabi tartar sauce. Arrange the oysters,
tomatoes, and lettuce on the bottom slices of bread. Top
with the remaining bread and gently press together. Enjoy.

Serves 4
Refrigerate remainder
Will not reheat well

Rec: Packet Cooking

Packet cooking is easy, which I think is the best sort of cooking. This is tastiest cooked over a grill, but it works beautifully in the oven as well. It's simple, low calorie and fast. This recipe serves four, but it can be halved for two, or quartered for one. I don't recommend making this for one, because it could just as easily be made for two or four, with the remaining servings frozen as is in the packet, then popped into the microwave for dinner on busy days. The best accompaniment to this is rice. A box rice is easiest, however, I'm posting a Spanish Rice recipe separately for those who are more ambitious. I've filched this recipe from The Change One Diet by the Reader's Digest people.

Snapper and Sugar Snap Peas in a Packet

3 cups sugar snap peas (fresh or frozen)
2 tablespoons lemon juice (fresh or bottled)
2 teaspoons olive oil
Salt and pepper to taste
4 red snapper filets, 6 ounces each (or other delicate fish, such as flounder or sole)

Preheat the oven to 400 degrees, or prepare the grill.

Toss the sugar snap peas, lemon juice, olive oil, salt and pepper together in a bowl.

Coat four 15-inch lengths of cooking parchment paper or aluminum foil with cooking spray. Place one filet on one-half of each paper then top with about 3/4 of the sugar snap peas. Fold the paper over the fish and peas and fold the edges all around to seal.

Put the packets on a baking sheet to go into the oven, or directly on the grill and cook for 10 to 12 minutes.

Monday, February 27, 2017

The Thought For Today

"I would love to speak a foreign language but I can't. So I grew hair under my arms instead." - Sue Kolinsky

Sunday, February 26, 2017

Saturday, February 25, 2017


My favorite Academy grad. Hey, grab a bottle of mescal and come for a visit.

Friday, February 24, 2017

The Thought For Today

"There's so much pollution in the air now that if it weren't for our lungs there'd be no place to put it all." - Robert Orben

Pushin Daisies: a mortuary novelty shop

Pushin Daisies: a mortuary novelty shop

Yup, it's Weird Friday again and I think that this will qualify. One of my favorites? The T-shirt: "Friends help you move...REAL friends help you move bodies!"

Thursday, February 23, 2017

The Thought For Today

"A new study shows that monkeys can look at photos and recognize other monkeys they know. However, the study also shows that monkeys are terrible with names." - Conan O'Brien

Lunar Property from the Lunar Embassy - World Headquarters

Lunar Property from the Lunar Embassy - World Headquarters

And speaking of...

Wednesday, February 22, 2017

The Thought For Today

"The sign said: "Eight items or less". So I changed my name to Les." - Steven Wright

Tired of Your Name? Try This Name Generator

Now that you have your Elf name, your Hobbit name, your Orc name, your stripper name and a host of other names, how about variations on your own name. This random name generator at the BabyNames site is a handy tool to find out who you might have been. After all, your name is quite a random and capricious event, as is occasionally made evident by parents who actually name their kids things like Ima Hogg. Well, if you're female you have an easy way out of that one in many cultures. It would be bad luck, though, if Ima ended up married to say a Mann or a Butler -- or worse. If I were Ima I probably would go by my middle name, even if it were, say, Gertrude. (In real life I don't have that option, since my parents didn't give me a middle name.) This is Blair Dakota signing off...

Tuesday, February 21, 2017

The Thought For Today

“Do you know what breakfast cereal is made of? It's made of all those little curly wooden shavings you find in pencil sharpeners!” ― Roald Dahl

Rec: Microwave Chicken Curry

2 tablespoons Indian curry paste
3 tablespoons olive oil
4 boneless, skinless chicken breasts, cut into strips
1/2 bunch basil leaves, chopped
1/2 bunch cilantro leaves, chopped
2 (13.5 oz) cans coconut milk
2 tablespoons soy sauce
kosher salt
freshly ground black pepper
3-4 cups steamed rice, to serve on
paprika, for garnish
1 scallion, thinly sliced for garnish

In a large microwave pot with a lid, mix together the curry
paste and oil. Microwave on HIGH for 3 minutes. Add the
chicken and stir. Cover and microwave on MEDIUM for 8
minutes. Add the basil, cilantro, coconut milk and soy
sauce and season with salt and pepper. Give it a good stir,
cover and microwave on MEDIUM for 4 minutes. Stir again,
cover and let rest for 3 or 4 minutes. Serve over steamed
rice and garnish with paprika and scallions.

Serves 4
Refrigerate remainder
Can be reheated in microwave

Rec: Crockpot Chicken & Dumplings

4 boneless skinless chicken breasts, cut in small chunks
2 cans cream of chicken soup
1/2 cup onion, finely diced
2 cups of water
1 chicken bouillon cube
2 carrots, peeled and sliced
2 stalks of celery, chopped
salt and pepper to taste
2 10 oz pkg refrigerated biscuits
2 tablespoons flour
1/2 cup heavy cream

Combine all ingredients, except biscuits, flour and cream
into crockpot. Cook on LOW 5 to 7 hours. 30 minutes
before serving, mix flour and cream together and add
to crockpot. Tear biscuit dough into 1 inch pieces (or cut
into fourths) and add to crockpot. Stir gently, cook on
HIGH for another 30 minutes or until biscuits are
fluffed up and cooked through.

Serves 6 to 8
Refrigerate remainder
Can be reheated in microwave

Rec: Crockpot Buffalo Chicken Wing Soup

6 cups milk
3 cans condensed cream of chicken soup (10 3/4 oz.) undiluted
3 cups shredded cooked chicken (about 1 lb.)
1 cup sour cream (8 oz.)
1/4 cup hot pepper sauce (1/4 to 1/2)

Put ingredients in crockpot, cover and cook on LOW
4 to 5 hours.

Serves 6 to 8
Refrigerate remainder
Can be reheated in microwave

Rec: Dijon Chicken

4 chicken breast halves
1 heaping tablespoon honey Dijon mustard
salt and coarsely ground black pepper or seasoned pepper
2 (8 oz) packages baby spinach or 1 pound washed and
dried fresh spinach leaves
2 tablespoons butter, cut in small pieces

Grease crockpot or spray with Pam. Wash chicken and pat dry.
Rub chicken with Dijon mustard and sprinkle with salt and
pepper. Place chicken breasts in crock pot. Top with spinach.
Spinach can be packed in, or add spinach in parts as spinach
wilts as it cooks. Dot spinach with butter and sprinkle with
more salt and pepper. Cover and cook on LOW for 5 to 6 hours.

Serves 4
Refrigerate remainder
Can be reheated in microwave

Rec: Creamy Homemade Crockpot Chicken Stew

1 cup lowfat evaporated milk
1/4 cup all-purpose flour
1 1/2 lbs chicken leg meat
3/4 lb small fresh button mushrooms
2 potatoes, peeled and cubed
2 cups pearl onions
2 large carrots, coarsely chopped
2 1/4 cups frozen green peas, thawed
1 cup chicken broth
1/2 teaspoon salt
1/4 teaspoon ground black pepper
1/2 teaspoon dried marjoram
1/4 teaspoon dried rosemary
1/4 cup chopped fresh parsley

In a small bowl, stir together evaporated milk and flour
until smooth. Place chicken, mushrooms, potatoes, onions,
carrots and peas in crockpot. Pour in milk mixture and broth.
Season with salt, pepper, marjoram and rosemary. Cook on LOW
for 6 hours. Stir in parsley and serve.

Serves 4
Refrigerate remainder
Can be reheated in microwave

Monday, February 20, 2017

The Thought For Today

"Expecting the world to treat you fairly because you are a good person is a little like expecting the bull not to attack you because you are a vegetarian." - Dennis Wholey

The Kilted Nation

And now the kilts are invading America.


Sunday, February 19, 2017

Saturday, February 18, 2017

Chuck Norris Facts

Chuck Norris Facts

Read and learn true wisdom about The Master. And have a couple of laughs. Even 'he' loves this Site.

Friday, February 17, 2017

The Thought For Today

"Women put a lot of thought into what their butts look like. Men aren't even aware of the fact that they have a butt until it starts itching." - Jeff Foxworthy

Thursday, February 16, 2017

The Thought For Today

"Is there anything more beautiful than a beautiful, beautiful flamingo, flying across in front of a beautiful sunset? And he's carrying a beautiful rose in his beak, and also he's carrying a very beautiful painting with his feet. And also, you're drunk." - Jack Handey

Shatner's Toupee

Shatner's Toupee

Funny stuff...

Wednesday, February 15, 2017

The Thought For Today

"A man in the house is worth two in the street." - Mae West

The UberPage of the First Church of Shatnerology!

The UberPage of the First Church of Shatnerology!

Oh, what evil people to treat our hero like this! Actually, Shatner loves it and you might too. Scroll down to the bottom of the page.

Tuesday, February 14, 2017

The Thought For Today

"Paris Hilton was arrested for cocaine possession, which is like arresting Bill Cosby for eating Jell-O." - Jimmy Kimmel

Rec: Microwave Meatloaf


1 1/2 lbs lean ground beef or ground turkey
8 ozs tomatoe sauce
1 egg, slightly beaten
1 cup quick-cooking rolled oats
1/4 cup minced onions
1/2 teaspoon minced garlic
1 teaspoon salt
1/4 teaspoon pepper


1/3 cup catsup
1 teaspoon worcestershire sauce
1 tablespoon brown sugar

Combine meatloaf ingredients in a bowl and mix with
(clean) hands until well mixed. Pat into a 9 x 5 microwave
loaf pan. Cook in microwave on HIGH 6 minutes. While
cooking, combine sauce elements into small bowl and
whisk until mixed. At the end of the 6 minutes pour
sauce over the loaf and continue cooking on HIGH for an
additional 5 to 7 minutes. (For a firmer loaf, decrease
tomato sauce to 6 ozs).

Serves 4 to 6
Refrigerate remainder
Can be reheated in microwave

Rec: Crockpot Hobo Dinner

In a large frying pan, combine:
5 - 6 bratwurst, kielbasa, or Italian sausage
1/2 C. water

Cook over medium high heat for about 5 minutes, until
partially done, turning frequently. Add additional water
if needed. Remove sausage from pan and set aside.

In the same pan, cook until slightly soft:
1 small head cabbage, sliced into bite-size pieces
1 lg. sweet onion, sliced
1 lg. clove garlic, chopped
1 teaspoon Old Bay seasoning

Put prepared sausage in bottom of large (5 -6 qt.)
crockpot. Add cabbage mixture.

Then top with:
6 ears of corn, cut in half

Cook on LOW setting for 4 to 5 hours.

Serves 6 to 8
Refrigerate remainder
Can be reheated in microwave

Rec: Crockpot Beef Bourguignon

1 lb sirloin tip roast, cut in 1/2-inch cubes
1/2 cup red wine
1/2 cup water
1 (10 1/2 oz) can cream of mushroom soup
1/2 (2 1/2 oz) package dry onion soup mix
1/4 lb mushrooms, sliced
1/4 cup green peppers, chopped
1/4 lb white pearl onions
1/4 teaspoon garlic powder
chopped fresh parsley

Put beef in crockpot. Mix other ingredients, excluding
parsley, together well in a bowl. Pour over beef and cook
in crockpot for 6 to 8 hours on LOW. Best served over
rice or noodles with parsley as a garnish.

Serves 2
Refrigerate remainder
Can be reheated in microwave

Rec: Crockpot Winter Harvest Beef Stew

1(3 to 4 lbs.) chuck roast, cut into cubes
1/2 teaspoon salt
1 teaspoon pepper
1 small rutabaga, peeled and cut into small cubes
2 large potatoes, cut into cubes
1 large onion, sliced
2 celery stalks, chopped
1 (10 1/2 oz.) can stewed tomatoes
1 (0.75 oz.) packet Cajun brown gravy mix
1 (16 oz.) pkg. frozen mixed vegetables

Put roast cubes into slow cooker and add all other
ingredients in the order listed. Cook on LOW for
6 to 8 hours and spoon into large soup bowls.
Serve with hot croissants or French bread.

Serves 4 to six
Refrigerate remainder
Can be reheated in microwave

Rec: Crockpot Hungarian Goulash

2 lbs. round steak cut into 1/2-inch cubes
1 1/2 teaspoon sweet paprika
1 can (14 1/2 oz.) tomatoes
2 tablespoon all-purpose flour
1/2 teaspoon black pepper
1/4 teaspoon dry thyme
1 minced garlic clove
1 cup chopped onion
1 teaspoon salt
1 cup sour cream

Put steak cubes, onion and garlic in Crockpot.
Add flour and stir to coat steak cubes. Add salt,
pepper, paprika, thyme and tomatoes. Stir well.
Cover and cook on LOW for 8 to 10 hours. Add sour
cream 30 minutes before serving. Stir in thoroughly.

Serves 4 to 6
Refrigerate remainder
Can be reheated in microwave

Monday, February 13, 2017

The Thought For Today

"I'm such a bad housekeeper, people wipe their feet before they leave, and when I cook, I serve Tums for after-dinner mints." - Joan Rivers

Sunday, February 12, 2017


Yeah, yeah I know. Some of your relatives STILL live in trees.

Saturday, February 11, 2017

Deano Sez: Dysfunctional Family Circus

The old DFC site, when active and accepting submissions, was just about the funniest, sickest, site out there. Many a lunch hour at IBM was spent composing captions, hoping that one of ours would be chosen for that week's posting. Of course, just as with everything else good for the soul and funny as all get-out, lawyers got involved and fucked it up for everyone. This is the best known archive without having to get messily involved with the Wayback Machine...

Friday, February 10, 2017

The Thought For Today

"If you live to the age of a hundred you have it made because very few people die past the age of a hundred." - George Burns

The Klingon Sex Manual by Spiletta42

The Klingon Sex Manual by Spiletta42

Is nothing sacred?

Thursday, February 09, 2017

The Thought For Today

"Hope for the Best. Expect the worst. Life is a play. We're unrehearsed." - Mel Brooks

Holy Sheep Dip!

No need to be sheepish about it, have some more sheep fun!

Wednesday, February 08, 2017

The Thought For Today

"Happiness is having a large, loving, caring, close-knit family in another city." - George Burns

Disposable Temporary E-Mail Address

Disposable Temporary E-Mail Address

"Why do you need Temporary Email? Maybe you need to register at a website and don't want to give out your personal email address. Or, Perhaps you are working at a Trade Show and want to create a Custom Temporary Email address for a week. The uses are endless." And these are just some of the legal ones. Have fun, and when questioned by the cops, I have no idea who you are.

Tuesday, February 07, 2017

The Thought For Today

Someone asked Fields: How do you like children?

"Parboiled!" - W.C.Fields

Rec: Crockpot Lamb Stew

2 pounds lamb, cubed
1/2 teaspoon sugar
2 tablespoons oil
2 teaspoons salt
1/4 teaspoon pepper
1/4 cup flour
2 cups water
3/4 cup red cooking wine
1/4 teaspoon powdered garlic
2 teaspoons Worcestershire sauce
6 medium carrots, sliced
4 small onions, quartered
4 ribs celery, sliced
3 medium potatoes, unpeeled, diced

Sprinkle lamb with sugar. Brown in oil in skillet.
Remove lamb and place in a crockpot (4 quart size),
reserving drippings. Stir salt, pepper, and flour into
drippings until smooth. Stir in water and wine until
smooth, stirring until broth simmers and thickens.
Pour into crockpot. Add remaining ingredients and
stir until well mixed. Cover. Cook on LOW 8 to 10 hours.

Serves 4 to 6
Refrigerate remainder
Can be reheated in microwave

Rec: Crockpot Indian Lamb Korma

2 tablespoons olive oil
1 tablespoon ground coriander
½ teaspoon hot chili powder
1 teaspoon ground turmeric
1teaspoon ground cinnamon
6 green cardamoms, crushed
2 cloves garlic, finely chopped
2 medium onions, chopped
1 tablespoon fresh ginger, finely chopped
1lb 9oz boneless lamb shoulder, roughly diced, most fat removed
4fl oz boiling water
1 chicken stock cube
½ teaspoon freshly ground black pepper
1-2 teaspoons cornstarch, optional
6 tablespoons double cream
2 tomatoes, roughly chopped
2 tablespoons fresh coriander, chopped

Preheat the heating base to Low. Place the stoneware on the
stove, add the oil and warm gently. Add the dried spices and
cook gently for 2 to 3 minutes, to release their flavour but
do not allow to burn. Add the garlic, onions, and ginger and
cook for a further 3 to 4 minutes, coating well in the spices
and oil. Next add the lamb, water and stock cube, season
well with salt and pepper, then place into the crockpot.
Cover with the lid and cook for 5 to 6 hours on LOW, or
3 to 4 hours on HIGH or until the meat is tender. Once
cooked, stir well. If the sauce is a little thin, mix the
cornstarch with 1 tablespoon water; stir into the korma
and cook for a few minutes on HIGH to thicken. Add the
cream, tomatoes and coriander. Check the seasoning and
serve.Serve Poppadums, Basmati rice and Raita.

Serves 4
Refrigerate remainder
Can be reheated in microwave

Rec: Irish Stew

2 pounds lamb stew meat
6 potatoes, sliced
4 onions, sliced
1 teaspoon salt
1 teaspoon pepper
1 teaspoon thyme
1 14½ oz can beef broth

Layer potatoes and lamb in crockpot. Add remaining
ingredients. Cover; cook on LOW 8 to 10 hours or
HIGH 3 to 5 hours.

Serves 4
Refrigerate remainder
Can be reheated in microwave

Rec: Crockpot Lamb Dijon

½ cup flour
1 teaspoon salt
1 teaspoon pepper
2 tablespoons vegetable oil
2 pounds lamb stew meat
6 new potatoes, cubed
¼ cup Dijon mustard
1 tablespoon lemon peel, grated
1 tablespoon lemon juice
½ teaspoon rosemary
2 teaspoons minced garlic
¼ teaspoon red pepper flakes
1 14½ oz can beef broth
1 10 oz pkg frozen green peas, thawed

Mix flour, salt, red pepper and pepper. Toss lamb in
mixture, then brown in skillet. Add lamb and remaining
ingredients, except for peas, to the crockpot. Cover; cook
on LOW 8 to 10 hours. Add peas during last 15 minutes of

Serves 4
Refrigerate remainder
Can be reheated in microwave

Rec: Easy Lamb Hot Pot

2 small onions, finely chopped
1 large carrot, peeled and chopped
2 large cloves garlic, crushed
1 1/2 inch thick lamb neck chops
4 oz black pudding, cut into 4 pieces (optional)
2 oz pearl barley, soaked
3 tablespoons flour
6 tablespoons cold water
3 large baking potatoes peeled and sliced
1 organic lamb or chicken stock cube
½ pint boiling water
4 tablespoons melted butter
freshly ground black pepper

Preheat the heating base on LOW. Place half the chopped
onions, carrots and garlic into the bottom of the crockpot.
Add the lamb neck chops, then top with the black pudding,
the rest of the onions, carrots and garlic and finally the pearl
barley. Mix the flour and cold water together to form a soft
batter, then pour over the onions and carrots. Place
overlapping potato slices on top. Dissolve the stock cube in
the boiling water and pour into the center of the potatoes.
Pour the melted butter over the potatoes and season well.
Cover and cook on LOW for 4 to 5 hours, or 2 to 3 hours on
HIGH, until the lamb is tender.

Serves 4
Refrigerate remainder
Can be reheated in microwave

Monday, February 06, 2017

The Thought For Today

"Cocaine is God's way of telling someone that they're too rich." - Robin Williams



Every American home should have at least one rubber chicken and Archie McPhee is THE place to find them. Along with a lot of other weird stuff. I just got my What Would An Angry Scotsman Do spinner, so now I no longer have to make up my mind for myself. Just spin that sucker and there's the answer.

Sunday, February 05, 2017

Friday, February 03, 2017

The Thought For Today

"I believe in loyalty. When a woman reaches an age she likes, she should stick to it." - Eva Gabor


Ok, this has to be here. http://www.illwillpress.com/
It's Weird Friday! Foamy is the best. I admit, I am a Foamy cult member. This little squirrel beats the pants off of Dennis Miller, Bill Mahr, and maybe even Dennis Leary as far as rants go.

Thursday, February 02, 2017

The Thought For Today

"The sight of women talking together has always made men uneasy; nowadays it means rank subversion." - Germaine Greer

Get Off My Lawn!

FREE of course. "The neighborhood kids are on your lawn again, and it's time to take action. And that action is murder." Rated 4.3 out of 5. And did I remember to say FREE?

Wednesday, February 01, 2017

The Thought For Today

"Asking a working writer what he thinks about critics is like asking a lamppost how it feels about dogs." - Christopher Hampton



"Welcome! You've stumbled into WTF?! - a WoW inspired side-scrolling Flash-based RPG." Looks like fun.